I have been completely scarred by what I witnessed mere hours ago, and these are scars that will never heal. Not even large amounts of salve or dozens of stitches can save me. If you value your sanity, you will not try to look this up.
Of course, it has probably found you already. The beast has a way of… getting around.
My innocence remained with me until late last night when I found something… interesting to say the least. It seemed to be a simple Youtube video: the thumbnail had an odd appearance, but the title of my favorite childhood television show happened to catch my eye. I didn’t hesitate in clicking the link.
I wish now I hadn’t.
Apparently I’d stumbled upon a remake of said show. It is one that has yet to come out, and I hope it never will. I can’t get the images out of my head.
Immediately my sights were treated- rather, subjected to- the main character: he was warped, twisted, with eyes and ears too big to be healthy; his hair was the strangest thing I’ve ever had to bear, completely unnatural; he looked as if he’d eaten one too many Big Macs and shone like freshly-melted butter.
Watching the rest of the video I could see the other characters, both heroes and villains, had undergone the same torture: one or two had barely any skin on their bones. Needless to say, I was revolted by the horrifying development on my laptop screen.
The man responsible for this heinous act happened to rear his ugly head: I call him Satan with a Man-Bun. He smiled, knowing he was shredding a treasured artifact of my past like an evil teacher unsatisfied with terrible homework. Some of his bootlicking minions showed up as well. They all laughed at me, enjoying my torment. This was the final crack in the glass I used to call “childhood”.
Now I sit on the brink of suicide, trying desperately not to slice my own wrists like bread loaves. It’s not every day you watch the end of the world unfold before your very eyes. Please find a way to get this show cancelled.
Remind people of what a Thundercat truly is.